Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi has given birth to her own bouncing baby meatball. She and her fiance Jionni LaValle welcomed son, Lorenzo Dominic into the world on August 26, 2012. Now that their little guy has made his appearance, we're simply dying to know what kind of mom the raucous reality star will be. Although she's given us quite a few hints during her pregnancy, some of the things she's said have thrown fans for a loop. Alternately cheeky or sappy, Snooki's over-sharing always packs a wallop.
"I'm going to be that person who has a glass of wine and [the baby] comes out with three legs."
You've got to give it up to the girl for comedic timing. During an interview on "Good Morning America" in June 2012, Snooks confirmed her stance on drinking alcohol when baby's on board. If this hilarious statement didn't convince us she was taking this mommy thing seriously, then nothing could have.
"Yeah, I've had a lot of stabbing dreams, like people are stabbing me in the elbow."
Only a pint-sized person with a huge imagination could come up with something like this in her subconscious. But leave it to Snooki to share one of the more bizarre side effects of carrying a little one in one's belly.
"It's kind of like you're a cow and you're just milking."
Fellow new moms everywhere are probably wondering whether Snooki will breastfeed baby "Enzo." Although Polizzi gave it some thought, she agreed that [breast] pumping might be a more comfortable option. Nicole is truly a pro when it comes to creative imagery.
"Having a kid real young means I can be a MILF." (Mom I'd Like to 'bleep')
There are perhaps millions of women who agree that being a young mother has certain benefits. At an MTV "Jersey Shore" screening party in March 2012, Polizzi championed those benefits in explicit detail. Who else could put the sentiment into such colorful words?
"I'm just trying to eat very healthy for the baby."
That doesn't sound too shocking does it? Perhaps it doesn't for most of Hollywood's new mommies. But Nicole stunned the world when she revealed some of her rather sensible diet choices; her "strange" pregnancy cravings involved little more than pineapple and Italian ices.
"This is what Mommy did. Learn from her mistakes."
Of course, we're all wondering just how Nicole is going to explain all the televised tomfoolery that's made her a household name. But instead of waxing poetic with politically correct rhetoric, she'd share her misdeeds as lessons well learned. Perhaps this is the most outrageous thing Snooki could have ever revealed.
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