1 minute ago 2010-02-09T20:13:55-08:00
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Speaking out for the first time since the death of her husband Patrick Swayze, Lisa Niemi says her loss has become "an animal all of its own" and that the sadness is "on a cellular level."
"When the grief takes you, your body's not your own," she said Tuesday during a roundtable discussion on Grief, Healing and Resilience at the Women's Conference 2009 in Long Beach, Calif.
In the past, she said she "never knew what to say to people that have lost somebody. I have a really good idea about it now."
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She told the panel - which included Maria Shriver, Elisabeth Edwards and Susan St. James, among others - how Ghost was on television recently. "I sat there for about 10 minutes saying, 'Do I have the courage to put it on that station?'" she said.
She also recalled another instance after Swayze's death when she began to have "a full blown panic attack." So she called a girlfriend, which she said "is really hard for me to do - but the act of picking the phone up and call someone, helped me.
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"I think that's a very important thing for people to do - sometimes just the act of reaching out connects you back to life and love," she added.
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After being married for 34 years, Niemi couldn't answer whether she sees herself now as a "widow" or still as a "wife." "Gosh, both," she said. "I've spent two-thirds of my life with him. Even if I hated his guts, I may be having a very hard time, I've been living a certain way for 34 years."
Even though Niemi told Swayze many times every day in his last month that she loved him, she said, "My regret is I didn't tell him I loved him enough over that 34 years."S
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Still, she said she is "so grateful for what I had and my connection to him. "I feel part of me believes that I will see him again. I'm just going to have go on until then," she said.
"It's been a tough last year and tough lasts however many weeks," she continued. "I suddenly realize from everything that everyone's telling me, if I don't show up today, when do I? I have a feeling I'm going to feel this way quite some time."
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cool personLisa you had a good man and i believe he will be waiting for you at the end of the rainbow when god comes for you, i wish i would have had a good husband that cared that much for me like you had, as for now enjoyed this life we have here that is the way Patrick would have wanted it, i know the pain of a love one gone but i know that i will see them one day!!! god speed to you!!!!report abuseposted November 3, 2009 11:10 PM PST
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cool personLisa you had a good man and i believe he will be waiting for you at the end of the rainbow when god comes for you, i wish i would have had a good husband that cared that much for me like you had, as for now enjoyed this life we have here that is the way Patrick would have wanted it, i know the pain of a love one gone but i know that i will see them one day!!! god speed to you!!!!report abuseposted November 3, 2009 11:10 PM PST
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cool personLisa you had a good man and i believe he will be waiting for you at the end of the rainbow when god comes for you, i wish i would have had a good husband that cared that much for me like you had, as for now enjoyed this life we have here that is the way Patrick would have wanted it, i know the pain of a love one gone but i know that i will see them one day!!! god speed to you!!!!report abuseposted November 3, 2009 11:10 PM PST
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flolShe will see him again and yes, he is there with her. That is not her imagination that she feels his hand. He learned a lesson that we all need to learn and that is LOVE is the most important lesson we can learn. Going on is hard but she must as she has lots more work to do. She has things she must learn on her own. May God be with her and help her thru these times. She has much to teach.report abuseposted October 30, 2009 5:32 PM PDT
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LOL... Search "ec4bag" on google to Get High quality luxury bags, 100% genuine leather, only $98-$198, Free shipping worldwide, WOW... Louis Vuitton, Chanel, Gucci, Fendi, Coach, Miu Miu, Dior, Hermes, Chloe, D&G and UGG bootsreport abuseposted October 28, 2009 3:36 PM PDT
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Nancy GI am so very sorry for her I cannot imagine how it would be to have to go on after loving and being with another person for that long . my deepest sympathyreport abuseposted October 28, 2009 2:30 PM PDT
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KetashaJMy heart aches For Niemi. I pray things get better.report abuseposted October 28, 2009 1:27 PM PDT
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