Kim Kardashian recently sat down to talk all things baby with talk show host Jimmy Kimmel ("Kimmel" -- now there's a good "K" name for the Kimye kid). Jimmy threw the mommy-to-be a quickie baby shower, and she opened up about what kind of life her little uterus dweller will have when it finally pops out.
Kim revealed that she and Kayne West will find out the sex of their child in a "week or two," and it's not surprising that they want to know if their baby will be a boy or girl -- they need to know the child's sex as soon as possible so that they can start shopping.
So how will the Kimye baby dress? According to Kim Kardashian, Mason and Penelope's hand me downs won't be good enough for her child. Here's what she told Jimmy Kimmel about being super-selective while raiding the closets of her niece and nephew: "I think she (Kourtney Kardashian) has a few key pieces but if anyone knows Kanye, they just know how into fashion he is and I think he's going to have things specially made so I don't think hand me downs are going to work."
So instead of looking dapper and adorable like Mason and Penelope, the Kimye baby is going to like a biker bar denizen or one of Lady Gaga's backup dancers -- Kim said that Kanye will have their baby wearing leather and chains. So she'll be wiping off dirty leather diapers while her baby sucks on a solid gold pacifier on a platinum chain.
But when the fetus finally makes its big entrance, Kanye West might not be waiting on the red carpet to swaddle it in a mink fur blanket. According to some reports, he's too "squeamish" to watch the birth and faints at the sight of blood.
Hopefully Kanye isn't as squeamish about other bodily fluids. Kim recently started using Kourtney Kardashian's breast milk as a skin treatment to try to clear up her psoriasis, but soon Penelope won't have to share her dinner anymore. Instead the Kimye baby will have to worry about mom using all its breakfast as a beauty treatment. Maybe Kanye would even get behind the idea of Kim bottling her own breast milk in fancy glass jars and selling it as a limited-edition line of lotion -- he might see it as some sort of high-concept art project.
Speaking of baby food, Kris Jenner revealed that Kim's fetus is currently craving Pizookies, which aren't some gross combination of cookies and pizza -- they're just giant cookies and ice cream from BJ's Brewhouse.
Kris Jenner doesn't seem to agree with Kim when it comes to showing the Kimye baby on TV. Kim made it clear that her baby won't make any appearances on any of the Kardashian TV shows during the first years of its life. However, Kris Jenner is about to get her own talk show, and it sounds like she wants to use the Kimye baby as a stage prop. She jokingly told E!, "We could have a nursery on the set and I could babysit." Maybe her first exclusive interview will be with her grandchild -- starting out with a guest that can only goo and ga might be a great way to ease into her new job.
So are you sad that Kim's baby won't star on one of her TV shows?
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