Author Says Lindsay Lohan Will Be Worth More Dead

Bleak but fascinating: Jo Piazza, author of the new book "Celebrity Inc.," argues that Lindsay Lohan would be more successful dead than alive. Piazza writes, via Gawker:

At this point yet another glimpse at her prematurely aging breasts paying homage to Marilyn Monroe will not reinvigorate Lindsay's sagging brand and career. The only thing that will save brand Lohan from total Kristy McNichol-dom is if she truly channels Monroe and actually leaves us for good.

Why? Because Lohan's brand -- inconsistent, unlikable, uninsurable -- "has nowhere to go but up in the afterlife," Piazza declares in her book. "America loves a train wreck, until the moment they don't anymore. But what America loves more than a comeback is a martyr -- someone who literally loses everything, including their life, because of the excesses inherent in a system that was meant to protect and nurture her."

"Once a celebrity passes away, the public is more apt to focus on their talents and the good in their life than the bad," marketing exec Steve Levitt told Piazza, citing the posthumous popularity of such larger-than-life legends as Elvis, Michael Jackson and Johnny Cash.

Lohan, who's just 25 (doesn't she seem 20 year older?), recently channeled Monroe -- another troubled blonde -- in a nude photo shoot for Playboy's January/February issue. Let's hope her continued Marilyn worship is not self-fulfilling prophecy.

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