James Devaney/WireImageJohnny Depp says he and the "The Rum Diary" director Bruce Robinson had a panic-induced giggle fit during a near-death experience on a private jet bound for L.A.:

The plane just shut down. The sound of the engines stopped. There was silence. Bruce and I were looking at each other and I think I said, 'Is this it?' It was like this weird extended moment when you're just floating for a second and you could feel this unpleasant descent.

Nobody said a word except for Bruce and I, sitting next to each other saying, 'Oh s--t! This is death; I guess this is how it goes down.' Then we burst into hysterical laughter at the idea that this was how we were going to die.

HAHAHAHAHA, not funny.

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Andreas Rentz/Getty ImagesWhen news broke that Hugh Grant had fathered a daughter with a mystery woman, it was only a matter of time before said mystery woman's identity was revealed. She is -- drumroll please -- Tinglan Hong, a Chinese aspiring actress Grant dated and impregnated earlier this year.

The Daily Mail reports that Hong is 19 years younger than the 51-year-old Brit, and that she gave birth Sept. 26. Unflattering sidenote: Grant was supposedly absent during the delivery in London but spent half an hour with the baby girl the following day -- before heading to Scotland for a golf tournament.

Kim and Khloe show their handbag commitment in Australia. (Lisa Maree Williams/Getty Images)Kim Kardashian is having commitment issues with the love of her life. No, not Kris Humphries: The reality TV maven is cancelling several business engagements in Australia and headed back to her home in the States.

Denise Truscello/WireImageA good way to get on Bruce Willis' bad side? Cheat on his ex-wife and mother of his three girls.

According to the National Enquirer, the "Die Hard" actor angrily confronted Ashton Kutcher during a hostile face-to-face meeting that left Kutcher trembling and begging Willis for mercy.

Ray Tamarra/Getty ImagesBeyonce: give it up. Stop trying to look over-the-top glamorous 24-7.  You are pregnant, and what pregnant woman walks around wearing these?

Yes, the other day Beyonce stepped out in a pair of Alain Quilci figure skater-inspired platform boots with a 5-inch heel and $1,180 price tag. Not even Michelle Kwan could walk in them.

Jon Kopaloff/FilmMagicCelebrity pixie Michelle Willliams suggests her 'do is a tribute to the late Heath Ledger (and not, as we presumed, a Mia Farrow copycat cut):

What Matilda would love is for her mom to grow out the cropped hair, though that's unlikely to happen anytime soon. I've really grown into it -- I feel like myself with short hair. And it's been a really long time since I had long hair, five years. Of course, the only people who like it are gay men and my girlfriends. Straight men across the board are not into this hair! I (first) cut it for the one straight man who has ever liked short hair and I wear it in memorial of somebody who really loved it.

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ELLEJessica Biel regrets losing "The Notebook" to Rachel McAdams.

(Can you imagine anyone else in that role? Admit it: you really loved kinda liked "The Notebook" too. And you still secretly hope McAdams will get back together with Ryan Gosling. Or not.)

"That's one that I wanted so badly," Biel admits in an interview with Elle magazine. "I was in the middle of shooting 'Texas Chainsaw Massacre,' and I auditioned with Ryan Gosling in my trailer -- covered in blood. [Director] Nick Cassavetes put me through the wringer in an interesting, excitingly creative way. But there's a million that get away. We're gluttons for punishment. It's just rejection."

TwitterA mob of furious Beliebers are coming out full force against Mariah Yeater.

Justin Bieber's alleged baby mama has riled superfans by making allegations in a paternity lawsuit that the squeaky-clean teen dream got her pregnant backstage at L.A.'s Staples Center. (He denies everything.)