Megan Fox on the cover of the February issue. (Sante D'Orazio/Esquire)
"I don't think people understand," the brunette beauty says in the February issue of Esquire. "They all think we should shut the f—k up and stop complaining because you live in a big house or you drive a Bentley. So your life must be so great. What people don't realize is that fame, whatever your worst experience in high school, when you were being bullied by those ten kids in high school, fame is that, but on a global scale, where you're being bullied by millions of people constantly."
In the interview, Fox – who welcomed her first child last year, a son named Noah, with husband Brian Austin Green – also discusses the downfalls of playing a sex symbol early on in roles like the boy-crazy teen daughter in “Hope & Faith,” and the scantily clad love interest in two “Tranformers” flicks.
"I felt powerless in that image. I didn't feel powerful. It ate every other part of my personality, not for me but for how people saw me, because there was nothing else to see or know,” she insists to the men’s magazine (the same one for which she also just posed for a photo shoot involving sheer lingerie and high heels). “That devalued me. Because I wasn't anything I was an image. I was a picture. I was a pose."
And in case you’re wondering what happened to the tattoo of Marilyn Monroe’s face, the one that used to stare into the cameras from Fox’s forearm, well it’s practically gone now thanks to laser treatments. The 26-year-old says the tat was a mistake ... and that the iconic actress from yesteryear reminds her a certain current-day starlet.
"I started reading about her and realized that her life was incredibly difficult. It's like when you visualize something for your future. I didn't want to visualize something so negative,” she insists. “She wasn't powerful at the time. She was sort of like Lindsay. She was an actress who wasn't reliable, who almost wasn't insurable.... She had all the potential in the world, and it was squandered. I’m not interested in following in those footsteps.”
One thing Fox is interested in following is the teachings of her church. It’s a church, she says where she’s seen “crazy things happen” and people be healed. It’s also a place where Fox says she gets the urge to speak in tongues … something she did for the first time at the age of 8, when she began attending a Pentecostal church in her home state of Tennessee.
"It feels like a lot of energy coming through the top of your head – I'm going to sound like such a lunatic – and then your whole body is filled with this electric current. And you just start speaking, but you're not thinking because you have no idea what you're saying. Words are coming out of your mouth, and you can't control it,” the actress explains. “The idea is that it's a language that only God understands. It's the language that's spoken in heaven. It's called 'getting the Holy Ghost.' "
And you thought Megan Fox was just another pretty face …
The February issue of Esquire hits newsstands on January 22.
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